Sky TV, Special Brew, Superkings...those benefit cuts in full/February 3rd 2012.

Richie - Would you Adam and Eve it! A viper's nest of feral state spongers has been uncovered right here in the upstanding Worcestershire village of Cum-to-Piddle! The family in question live in a two million squid mansion and drive a fleet of luxury cars! The father is forever out on the golf course and the feckless mother has regular tummy-tucks and botox sessions at the local face transplant boutique. Their kids (FOUR of em, Rich, nudge nudge wink wink!) have got all the latest hi tech gadgets and go to private school. It's a life of luxury and the poor old UK taxpayer has been footing the bill! How come, you ask ? Well, it seems the father is a banker of the highest order and has been sucking the lifeblood out of the populace for years through excessive loan and credit card charges as honest working people struggle through life on slave wages. Needless to say, a vigilante mob carrying pitchforks and flaming torches left the snug at midnight to put right this terrible injustice and the family has now scarpered to their caribbean holiday home. In his defence the father blamed the Thatcher government of the 80s for deregulating the banks - an outrageous statement I say as we all know that Labour and Gordon McDonut Stalin Brown are to blame for the world's ills, eh Rich! (Hic!)