Why don't YOU do the right thing, Dave!/May 28th 2010

Richie - Wednesday morning I fire up the XJ6 and head towards the shires where my brother, Howard Roberts, a prominent Tory of those parts, is celebrating his birthday. Of course, dear Howard isn't expecting me - a chipper dyed-in-wool Labour chappie - to make an appearance, especially now Dippy Dave has barricaded himself in No 10. But the chance to enjoy mirth and merriment at Howard's expense is something I just can't resist. It's a garden party and the gathering is filled with Turnip-types. And how miserable they all look! - this ZanuConDem govt really is bad for their health! Unfortunately I remind them of the VAT and NI hike, the backtracking on CGT and the impending council tax increases being dreamt up by Squire Pickles and they start getting upset! And when I sing The Red Flag and Bring Back My Gordon To Me Howard displays his anti-democratic tendencies and ejects me from the festivities! Is that any way to treat a brother -I thought we were all in his together, eh Rich ? (Hic!)