Brown's Britain in 2015 and even the Queen has fled/March 2nd, 2010

Richie - Back here in the real world, the second pre-General Election knees-up took place in our village pub with those two comedy fruitcakes Nutty Nigel Farage and Cheeky Chappie Nick Griffin providing the night's theme. Well, what fun we had! Dr Singh gave a suberb impersonation of the UKIP leader's lunatic rant at the EU last week and was so convincing he was roundly booed by regulars in the snug amid cries of "Shame! Shame!" and "You make us feel embarassed to be British, you dipstick Farage!" Then Mad Mick, the village idiot and BNP devotee, offered laughs all round by doing a number of funny walks to and from the bar in imitation of his hero. Such was the level of hilarity that Mrs Bob No 3 got a pork scratching stuck in her throat but was rescued by Frank the landlord who performed ze "Himmler Manouver". Thankfully wifey was well enough to sing the night to a close with a rousing version of Anarchy In The UK complete with sitar and gong chime accompaniment. Chins up, voters!