What next on the NHS? Bikini waxes for bisexuals?/May 25th 2010.

Richie - The landlord of our village local, Big Frank - a former BNP hardnut now a climate change activist and animal rights campaigner - finally underwent his gender realignment operation last week. With the full support of his wife and kids Frank has been transformed into Frances and to celebrate we laid on a welcome home party in the snug. I must admit, although Frank had set his heart on attaining the wispy, ethereal look of Keira Knightly, he looked to me more like Fatima Whitbread as he walked through the door. Still, Frances received much warmth from regulars, including amongst their number a few old associates from the local BNP coven who still retain an affection for their former comrade. Indeed, in the spirit of coalition currently sweeping the country, the local BNP bovver boys have offered to provide extra muscle for Frances and her merry band of eco-warriors next time they mount a covert operation to save bunny wabbits and lab mice marked for experimentation! Mad innit!