The police should be feeling a few ermine collars too/October 19th 2010.

Richie - Your mention of the Stones brought back memories of a dinner date I had with one of Jagger's exotic girlfriends back in the early 80s. I was in scintillating form and immediately engaged in thought-provoking conversation. As we ate our prawn cocktail I outlined the plots of all my favourite Freddie Forsyth novels. Then, as we tucked in to salmon and spinach lunghi (I dribbled a little salmon down the front of my tuxedo and had to discreetly remove my dentures after a rogue slither of spinach got caught up in my windpipe) I moved on to camshafts and rocker valves! I could see by the glazed look in her eyes that she was entranced, so much so that she got up, threw down her napkin and walked out of the restaurant. Clearly my eloquent conversation had worked the poor girl into a passionate frenzy of lust and she simply couldn’t wait for some late night satisfaction on my Chesterfield sofa but would you adam and eve it Richie she disappeared never to be seen again! Mad innit!