Titter ye not, it's an Inconvenient Sooth/January 18th 2011.

Richie - It was a lazy Monday afternoon in the snug when Arthur Groat suggested we all have a wager on the content of your forthcoming column. Dr Singh said it was a dead cert that you'd at last tackle the Coulsen affair while old Arthur said Cameron's loopy ideas for "reforming" - or privatising - the NHS would be top of your agenda. Marcia Braithwaite went with bins and Gordon Brown and our landlady Frances (formerly Big Frank, BNP hardnut) suggested you'd give Blair a good kicking. Finally, I wagered that you'd devote your column to the gay and straight Worcester art students who got married as part of their degree project. Satisfied with our choices we all put a fiver in the kitty and returned to our snifters. However, my precocious 10 year old grandson Bob Roberts jnr demanded that he join in the fun too and wagered all his pocket money that you'd write an incoherent mess incorporating climate change, ancient Rome and Frankie Howerd. How we all laughed Rich! How we all laughed..