The Ice Age is coming... don't panic!/June 17th 2011.

Richie - Your genius, sir, knows no bounds! Global Cooling indeed! - a quite brilliant idea worthy of the great Tolstoy imself! But do you know, Rich, the trouble your top-notch satire has caused ? Well, let me elaborate. I was snoozing in my comfy chair when I was awoken by the hurried pitter-patter of my dear Thai wife Mrs Bob No 3. The poor soul was rushing from room to room in order to hoard blankets, hot water bottles, vapour rub and all manner of wintery condiments. When I asked her why she replied: "Because Littlewon he warn us of giant winter fweeze, Wob!" Of course, after reading your esteemed column I assured her that Global Cooling was nothing but a fictitious conceit that had emerged Venus-like from Lord Richie's esteemed satirical mind. Well, Mrs Wob was mightily upset that the world was not in imminent danger of becoming a freezer box. Indeed, she let off a tremendous amount of much-needed hot air with many Thai obscenities directed towards your good self! Mad I say!