It's Chris Huhne's hypocrisy and lies that matter - not his sex life/June 22nd 2010.

Richie - There was serious concern over the weekend when Arthur Groat, octogenarian spoon-playing virtuoso farmer of these parts, announced in the snug that he was "gay". Arthur, who usually says very little and, when he does, has a habit of mumbling into his pint glass, proudly announced with a smile that he was now "swinging the other way" and was partial to "a bit of rough". Dr Singh was summoned pronto to try and get to the bottom of the matter, although Arthur's thick worcester accent and the docs dulcet Mumbai inflections meant the conversation was difficult to say the least. Thankfully Arthur's sexuality was eventually clarified. It transpired that he was not "gay" but guest of honour at the annual "hay" throwing festival in which competitors "swing" a bale in the opposite direction to their opponent, the winner being the person whose bale lands nearest the rough edge of the field. Needless to say, we red-blooded locals breathed a sigh of relief and ordered pints all round!