If Britain's broke, how can so many people afford a new iPhone?/June 25th 2010.

Richie - Our village, Come-to-Piddle, has been at the centre of a sex scandal! It seems that Marcia Braithwaite, the baker's assistant, has been dilly-dallying in smutty sex sessions and her cellar has been exposed as a wheelie-bin dungeon, no less! Perverts from as far as Barking have been bringing their bins and carrying out sordid acts with their rubbish depositories! Marcia, a demure woman in her late 50s, has been exposed as a wheelie-bin fetishist of the highest order and, after a raid by Health and Safety officers, a number of shackled and hooded bins were rescued from an abject life of sex slavery! Needless to say, our upstanding village is reeling from this news and Rev Pritchard will be conducting a special service on Sunday so we can atone for the heinous bin-abuse that has been taking place on our doorstep. Defending her actions Marcia said she needed to find a new income stream due to the fact that Iain Dunkin Donut was raising the retirement age! Mad in ShamCams uk innit!